Penguin Filter

By · Sunday, August 9th, 2009

Penguin Filter

One of the great things about the relationship is that no matter if you have an agreement or not with the other party. Remember that some of the conversations we had in the past with his best friend, partner or even children. Do you always agree with them? What happens when you disagree? Is it the end of the world or gay joke? Sometimes we simply agree to disagree. I heard someone say once, "You might be right or be happy." I know I'd rather be happy.
You can also build relationships with others, though I do not get along. I have had jobs in the past when I personally did not get along with my bosses for any reason, but still respect their position – they were still my boss, who is running the program and for all intents and purposes knew what they were doing. With that, my professional integrity remained intact.

So what can we do about Rapport happening?

Interaction with other is multifaceted. We all have our own opinions about life that we think is right, we have different values and beliefs, there are cultural issues and many other things that need to be taken into account when dealing with others. So I've come with some very basic building strategies relationship that could only make it happen for you.

First, take baby steps. If you're uncomfortable matching and mirroring of behavior and speech of others, begin by practicing with yourself in front of a mirror, find a partner will feel comfortable in exercise, or the mirror that someone on TV. The more you practice, more fluid your skills to establish a relationship will become – think of it as you participate in a slow motion dance with somebody.

Read each point of first and take time to absorb its meaning.

* Take a genuine interest in the other person.

* Become curious know how the other person thinks, what they value most, what kind of humor they have, what language they use – is auditory, visual, or feeling?

* If there is an apparent age difference between you and another person, learn about that generation, what are their values, what motivates them and show interest in their history.

* Be willing and flexible enough to see life through the eyes of another person? How do I see the world?

* Communication have opened up with others and be willing to reveal some things about yourself, of course within reason, and when appropriate.

* People can feel the handling, if not consciously, then subconsciously. I feel the handling of a mile away and do not like one bit! At times I have kicked me to accept something that really would not. As I said before, the relationship is the mutual influence – a give and take experience. An example of this is when, between jokes, brainstorming together a project, class, or simply being part of an effective team.

* Mirror and matching your posture and movements. This is not to copy or imitate. Once respondents a young man who copied my every move. When I invited him in the workplace, saying "Walk This Way" did it for me copy exactly. For something serious like a job interview I thought it was part of a comedy routine. This is definitely not what I'm talking about. When the flow of movement as a dance show that is in tune with others.

For example, if someone crosses the weapons that could subtly do the same or crossing your feet. You could match someone's breathing rate with the speed of blinking, foot tapping may be equated with nodding in rhythm, pulling the earlobe could pull the skirt / pants / shirt. The observation again, this takes practice and subtle. After a while it will be something you do unconsciously.

* Communication and really hear his voice. What tone, pitch, rhythm, volume and the text used?

* What is your rate of breathing – fast, slow, even erratic? Notification its rate of breathing and do the same. I think when I do one-on-one sessions with my clients, my pace and my breathing becomes one client. So be my client and I are totally in the present moment and self-centered.

* Everyone has a unique way we move, some of us are slow, fast and stable, or just make a move. I think that something was moving like a penguin (women would have been nice, but there you have it). The single movement of the other is something that can be matched but not be too the penguin Waddle!

* Actively listen to the other person – be interested in what they have to say. Even my son knows that when I'm not there and listen to him.

* Know and understand what his relationship with his "I" is to establish a relationship with others.

* Be in this moment.

* And the biggest and most efficient strategy of consolidation of the relationship is when you are personally involved in the process of building the relationship. Makes sense, right?

Have many wonderful moments in building relationships!

Michaela is a graduate of a well known parapsychology academy in Sydney Australia, and is a highly-regarded professional within this field.

She is also a Transformational Coach, certified practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), and writer who is totally committed to helping others create positive and action oriented changes to their lives.

A high achiever in many areas of her life, Michaela has extensive experience through not only her varied careers but also her interests and education in the fields of spirituality, aromatherapy and massage, personal development and transformational coaching, to writing, meditation, and psychometry.

Michaela is the author of the eBook 10 Colour Meditation Scripts, and publisher of a monthly e-newsletter called From My Desk which is available via subscription at http://www.michaelascherr.com

Married to David, Michaela has two children, Kristen and Aaron, and a grandchild called Matthew. Michaela and her family currently live in Brisbane Australia.

Some of my tank set ups

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